Freddy vs Jason (2003)

Directed By: Ronny Yu
Written By: Damian Shannon and Mark Swift
Year of Release: 2003

Freddy Krueger is in hell..literally. It’€™s been nearly ten years since Krueger invaded dreams to exact his deadly form of revenge and murder. Now, the memory of his legend has been systematically erased by a town determined to put an end to Freddy once and for all. Potential victims have been drugged to prevent them from dreaming, rendering him powerless. Like an inmate with a life sentence, Freddy€™ has been plotting a fantastic revenge that will never happen. That is, until Freddy resurrects Jason Voorhees, the equally iconic madman and the perfect means for Freddy to once again instill fear on Elm Street, creating a window of opportunity for him to emerge from his purgatory. Recognizing how easily manipulated Jason is, Freddy sends Jason on a journey to Springwood to start a new reign of terror.

Let’s face it, the truth is that no other horror movie was as highly anticipated as the slugfest between Freddy and Jason. For countless years it was stuck in pre-production hell with countless scripts rejected. Finally in 2003, I drooled as screen caps and trailers were actually released. “Holy shit, this is actually gonna happen!!”

I was there opening night, the very first showing. To say that I was excited would be an understatement, and it was a sold out show. Also, there were lines outside waiting to get into the show when the one I was at was over. For a horror film, this was something that was beyond anything I had ever seen. This kind of turnout was reserved for things like Star Wars, but FvJ packed the house.

The opening moment of the film is glorious, as a horror fan you probably had a surreal moment also when you heard the Nightmare theme music followed by a Jason theme. The movie’s actual opening was great, as Freddy explains his absence, where he’s been, his love for killing children. Ya know, the typical things. Then we cut to a Jason moment, which has the woods, nudity, stalking, and gore. All right, we are rockin’ so far.

Jason’s mother appears, appears to command him to kill, says he will never die, but wait, that isn’t mommy, it’s Freddy! Hit the titles and we are on our way. Unfortunately, that’s about as good as it gets. The rest of the film is pretty much a slap in the face to what both series represent.

Let’s start off with the heavy CGI. Yes, think about that for a moment will you? Jason Voorhees and CGI should never be in the same film together. The Friday the 13th series is something that has always taken pride in the realistic and gory ways it’s victims were dispatched. So why they used sub-par effects in a big budget horror film is still beyond me.

The dialogue is almost B-movie bad. Now, I know horror movies aren’t known for their acting, but this is beyond even horror film standards. For some reason, the writers thought the audience would be people without brains. It’s as if they thought we weren’t humans capable of thinking, but rather slabs of meat with eyes, as the characters feel the need to narrate everything they do.

Anyone remember this Freddy line? “I’m not strong enough yet, but I will be. Until then, I’ll let Jason have some fun!” Yeah, I totally couldn’t tell you weren’t strong enough when the blade you attempted to stab someone with didn’t do any kind of damage. I mean silly me, I assumed you were just showing kind and gentle mercy by letting him go!

At one point, Deputy Stubbs goes on a rant about how Freddy might be using Jason to get fear instilled back in the town. Holy shit Columbo, how did you figure that out?! How does someone who has no clue what’s going on at any other part of the film, suddenly unravel the plot?

For the benefit of the general public, Kelly Rowland should never act again. She’s a talented singer, so go back to doing that and stay out of the acting world please! That ending speech towards Freddy? Yeah, I just pretend that never happened.

Another problem with the film, they hired Ronny Yu to direct it. Now, let me set this up here for a minute. Prior to making this film, Ronny Yu had never watched a Friday the 13th or Nightmare on Elm Street film. No no, you read correctly, read it again. You are taking arguably the biggest horror project of all-time, and handing it over to a man who knows nothing of the characters? Am I the only one who sees that as slightly crazy?

Will all the negatives of this film, there ARE some positives. Jason looks as badass as ever. He’s gigantic, imposing, and overall ruthless in his pursuit. Freddy’s makeup looks probably the best it ever has. The Freddy one liners are all there, and Englund gives the performance you’d expect. The fight scenes are a little over the top, but we are talking about two fictional horror characters so what could I expect? I just thought they were a little too “pro wrestling” for my standards, but they were alright.

Jason does kill innocent people in this movie, but for some reason he comes out as the “hero” regardless of what he’s done. I suppose it’s the fact that he’s being manipulated because he’s mentally challenged. That could be for the fact that no one really gives a shit about the characters, or that he was tricked and just doing what he’s told because he’s dumb. I think it’s a little of both.

Although fake at times, the blood does flow pretty heavily in this movie. Freddy doesn’t do much, but Jason’s kills are pretty brutal. I didn’t really enjoy the fact that Jason only killed with his machete throughout this whole movie. To me it was just not creative at all which was disappointing. The only thing I can say that was creative was the bed kill for Jason. Besides that, too many comic book looking parts. Jason tossing a raver hundreds of feet through the air? Lame.

The ending bout between Freddy and Jason is fun to watch. As a horror fan it’s still a very cool moment to see them actually slugging it out and watching the blood burst out of every direction. Sure, the blood looks terrible because it sprays like a large pipe just sprung a leak, but what can you do? Come on, Jason Voorhees is a rotting corpse, how can his blood pressure be that high?

Overall, New Line missed the mark, and badly. I can’t sum up my feelings anymore than just “disappointed.” I don’t understand how you can take so many years developing a project, and then put out a mediocre MTV slasher between the 2 biggest horror giants in the world. I’m glad it was made, and I do have fun watching it. In the big scope of things, that may be all that matters, but I still cringe at far too many moments. The movie wasn’t made for fans of the characters, but teenagers of the MTV era, which is a real shame to the fans who have supported both characters throughout the years.

6.5/10